Edifying the TRUE feminine spirit

Scary Stastics

2006-04-22T20:36:00.000-07:00

https://www.moreinfo247.com/9218068.9218068/Department.vstore?id=32

There is a great article on this site about natural cleaners and where they are used at. It also has some scary stastics. I was on Consumer Reports today to and read some more scary stuff about cleaners. In 2004, American Association of Poision Control listed 125,000 children under the age of six hospitalized for accidental ingestion of cleaners. Thirty children under the age of five die every year from it. :( Forward this to anyone that is a care taker or a parent. We need to bring this stastic DOWN.

I am getting some of this. I know my kids are old enough to know better than to drink cleaner, but I do have a two year old neice, two cats, and a very very dumb dog.

Self Control

2005-04-19T09:38:00.000-07:00

How can we submit to someone who is, at best, imperfect? By submitting through faith in our mighty God! As we submit to God’s plan in faith, we are “shielded by God’s power”. No matter how many bad decisions our husbands make, we are shielded. Yes, we may suffer some consequences with him but we will not be overthrown.

It is not enough to submit reluctantly or grudgingly. Remember the happy heart scenario? Would you submit to God grudgingly? I sure hope not. Remember by submitting to your husband you are submitting to God!

Let me answer a couple of questions that some of you may be asking yourself.

1. If my husband has control, does that override God’s control in my life? No. As the leader of our home, our husbands are to submit to God’s control as well - which brings us to another question.

2. What if my husband does not submit to God? Does that mean I don’t have to submit to him? That is just an excuse. While you are not responsible for your husband’s sin, you are responsible for your own. God requires submission as an act of obedient faith. He doesn’t require this so He can get control. He’s already in control. Pray for your husband faithfully to submit to God’s will.

The submission that God requires is not passive. It is active obedience and acceptance to God’s plan. How can we actively submit to our husbands and ultimately to God?

Read 1 Peter 1:13.

Look!! There’s the control that we so humanly desire! But it’s not control over our husbands. This control is more important. It’s self control. Prepare your mind for action by acknowledging that God is the ultimate authority. We must determine to cooperate with God by embracing God’s plan of submission to our husbands.

We must have self control! We can no longer allow ourselves to assume the leadership role in our home. Of course, we should be leaders to our children and maybe even in aspects of the church and community. We must relinquish our control of the leadership role of the house and set our control on our own attitudes, thoughts and actions. It takes discipline to submit to our husbands in accordance with the command of our God!

Don’t allow your mind to dwell on the possible consequences of what appears to us to be bad judgement on our husband’s part. Set your hope fully in God’s grace.

Jesus lives in us by faith. He is revealed to us every day as we submit to God’s authority. As wives, we are faced with a choice. God says, “As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do.” (1:14-15).

Remember, the Bible says the devil only comes to kill, steal and destroy. If we sit around dwelling on the decisions that we “could have made a better choice” than our husbands, the devil is killing your obedience, stealing your happy heart and destroying you with worry.

Choosing to obey

2005-04-12T08:57:00.000-07:00

So now we know that submission is a choice. We aren’t forced to submit but the Bible says we should. When we choose to submit, we are choosing to obey.

It’s easy to think that the Scripture does not apply in our own circumstances. Surely it can’t mean that we are supposed to submit to men that don’t look for God’s will or are not in line with what we understand God’s will to be.

Read 1 Peter 1:1-5. When we read this, we realize that this passage was written especially for us when our husbands are not Christians or fail to make decisions in line with God’s direction. After all, it does say that we can win over our husband without words. If a man already has a strong walk with God, he doesn’t need much “winning over.”

Do you truly understand that verse? If so, you need to prepare to make some changes in your own life.

To understand what the Bible means by, “In the same way,” we have to start at the beginning of the verse.

Re-read verses 1 and 2. Did you notice that this Scripture was written for those who have accepted Christ as Saviour and Lord?

Note that first we were “chosen”. From the beginning, the God who had all knowledge of the situations we would face in our marriages today chose you and me!

What were we chosen for?

Obedience. Since we are chosen, we are faced with an immediate choice. Will we choose to be obedient or disobedient to God’s Word and will? Are you willing to obey what God shows you? That is what really matters. It’s not a question of whether or not our husbands are capable or worthy of leadership or whether or not we think we could do a better job. Those things are for God to decide.

If we are unwilling to submit to God here, at the foundation of this call, who are we to even dare judge our husbands for their failures in the leadership areas God has called them to? By choosing not to submit to our husbands in the ways God ordained, we then choose to rebel against God’s design for us.

The next thing we were chosen for is “sprinkling by his blood”. The blood of Jesus gives us the power to overcome and rescue ourselves from the wrong choices we have made. God knew we would fail in obedience at times. He chose us for forgiveness and for redemption through the blood of Jesus Christ.

Submission is a difficult choice God has called us to make. Commitment is never easy. We have to work hard to get the things we want. School is not easy. Getting a degree is not easy. Sometimes, following God is not easy. Child birth is not easy. Marriage is not easy. Do you know what all of these difficulties have in common? The end result is worth it. Finishing school was worth it. Getting a degree to further a career was worth it. Following God is worth it. That sweet little newborn was worth the pain of child birth. Our marriages and our husbands are worth it.

Submission brings the richness of God’s protection and a blessing that will free you in a way that nothing else can. It keeps you from feeling obligated to say yes everytime someone asks you to do something. You can tell them not only do you need to pray about it but you need to talk it over with your husband. Look at Biblical submission and how those in authority are supposed to love and care for those in submission. It is a wonderfully protected and cherished position.

Play nice!

2005-04-06T16:10:00.000-07:00

Colossians 3:12-14 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them together in perfect unity.

As Christians, we ALL need to be compassionate, kind, humble, gentle and patient with EVERYONE. We need to bear with our husband and try to get along with him at all times. We need to be forgiving and loving. Even if your husband is not a Christian, you are NOT exempt from living your life according to God’s Word. Be an example of God’s love. Strive to live your life as a godly example.

Read 1 Peter 3:1-6. Oooh, submission. That’s a tough one. Or at least, we try to make it tough. It’s really not. We are to submit to our husbands as we submit to God. And I must reiterate: you do not have to submit to abuse or illegal activity.

It is with our attitudes (remember – happy hearts!) and our actions (striving to live a life according to God’s Word) that we can convince our husbands. We don’t have to say a word. Our quiet spirits will say enough.

Remember, to be an outstanding disciple of Christ is to approach life and marriage with the same heart attitude that Jesus approached everyone and everything during His time on earth.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

2005-04-01T10:07:00.000-08:00

Respect. To get respect we’ve got to give respect. Some think that respect must be earned. In some cases, that could be true. If you want your husband to respect you, you must respect him.

What stops a godly wife from respecting her husband? Pride. Remember what I told you earlier in the study about not with holding anything good from your husband? Well that includes respect. I know our husbands can be trying and sometimes down right obstinate…but that does not give us any cause to think that they do not deserve our respect. The Bible clearly states that we are to respect our husbands.

Jesus respected the men and women around Him. As His followers we should do the same. Think about respect this way: the Bible says that we are to submit to our husbands as we would to God. So then we know that even if we have difficulty submitting to our husbands we can see it as submitting to God and that makes it easier. Treat respect the same way. If you respect your husband, you are respecting God.

What are some ways we could show respect?

Ø Putting the needs of our husbands before our own.

Ø Going to him for advice on non-spiritual matters (if he is un-saved) even if we think we already know his answer. It is not respectful to assume we know what someone is thinking.

Let me give you an example. We were an Air Force family. We got paid twice a month. I am taking a course on professional dress-making and I can go no further until I buy some material to make a dress. But I also wanted to purchase a Bible study for my quiet time. I am a home-maker. My husband is a wonderful man and if I ask, I generally receive. I prayed over my dilemma thinking that we would not have enough money for both the material and the Bible study. I decided that if I must choose then, obviously, I would choose the Bible study. So I went to my husband and reminded him about the Bible study and asked if perhaps we could purchase it. He also knew that I needed material for a dress. He asked, “What about the dress stuff you need?” I told him that I could wait on the material but I felt that if we could, I really needed the new Bible study. He smiled and then surprised me by telling me I could have both the material and the study. I was elated and thanked God. So the children and I went to Wal-Mart for material. I found onde crepe on sale for $2.00 a yard and a beautiful pattern on sale for $1.74. God blessed me with my needs because not only did I pray, but I followed His word and respected my husband.

Ø We can let our husbands lead by leaving decisions up to him. The only decision my husband does not make has to do with feminine hygiene products.

Don’t get me wrong here ladies, that does not mean that I do not discuss things with my husband. I do. I talk to him about any decision that needs to be made. But the final decision is up to him unless it comes to car insurance because he doesn’t really understand the policy and doesn’t want to since he knows I used to sell the stuff. Ha ha. But I never make a change to the policy without asking him first.

Ø We can listen and follow his advice with a happy heart.

Our husbands have a lot to tell us and can really help us if we listen. Remember, the devil is out to kill, steal and destroy our joy. Our attitude is a decision. Get up every morning and rejoice in the day that God made and carry a happy heart. It is a conscious effort on our part (in partner with God) to carry a happy heart every day. For instance, my favorite color is red. It’s bright, it’s beautiful and it complements my skin tone. My husband’s favorite color is blue. If I ask my husband for his advice on a new dress (like what color) and he says blue instead of red, I make (or buy) a blue dress. It’s his favorite color and I am happy to make him happy.

Ø Don’t grumble or complain. It’s unbecoming and remember, frowning will cause wrinkles. * smile *

Ø Do not nag or argue.

That one took me a while to master and on occasion, I still do both. You are not his mother. You are his wife.

Let me give you some verses to read in Proverbs. You will see why it’s better to humble yourself instead of provoking an argument.

Ø Proverbs 12:4 – A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.

Ø Proverbs 19:13 – A foolish son is his father’s ruin, and a quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping.

Ø Proverbs 21:9 – Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.

Ø Proverbs 21:19 – Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and ill tempered wife.

Ø Proverbs 27:15 – A quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping on a rainy day.

We’ve all had a dripping faucet or a rainy day at some point. What do we do? It could drive us crazy or we could just ignore it until the plumber comes or the sun starts to shine. If it drives us crazy, we want to get away from the noise. We could just ignore the noise all together. I don’t know about you ladies but I don’t want my husband to flee from our home because my nagging has drove him to it and I don’t want him to ignore me either.

Make a list of ten things you can do for your husband to show your love and respect. You can make it a list of ten things you could ask your husband for advice on or ten ways you can improve yourself so he sees your respect. How ever you wish to do it. If you don’t know or aren’t sure, ask him. Ask him how you could help him out. Is there an errand he needs done that you could do to help free up his time?

Looking at headship

2005-03-25T17:59:00.000-08:00

Okay - so now that we’ve covered a few of the basics, let’s get into the specifics of what the Bible says. The first thing that we need to understand is the authority that God set up for us to abide by.

1 Cor. 11:3 – But I want you to know that the head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.

Let’s look at this piece by piece. Head primarily means authority or top. But just because the head of the woman is man does not make us any less important. Obviously, Christ is not beneath God. Christ was God on earth. God is the head of Christ and man is the head of woman. That doesn’t mean that either Christ or a woman is less valuable. After all, if it weren’t for Christ, our sins would not be redeemed. I think that’s pretty important. Don’t you? Submission does not indicate inferiority but subordination. Just as Christ and God had different roles in the Bible (and we know this as truth from Jesus praying to God in the desert and in the garden) we have different roles from men.

God determined this order of submission when Adam and Eve were in the Garden of Eden. We were made as a helper. We were taken from a rib (which is in the middle of the body). We were not taken from his toe and we were not taken from his head. Some theologists view this as God’s way of showing the equality between men and women. We were not meant to be below (or walked on) man and we were not meant to be above man. God further determined it when Adam and Eve were disciplined from eating from the tree of knowledge of good and evil.

Genesis 3:16 – To the woman He said: I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception; in pain you shall bring forth children; your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.

If you haven’t already done so, go back and read the first post called, “The Battle of the Sexes,” I go into detail on this verse.

To be a godly wife, we must be submissive and follow our husband’s lead. If we want to claim that we follow God then we must obey Him. To obey Him we must submit to our husband as we submit to Him.

Go back and read Eph. 5:22-24.

You will read this from me a hundred times: to submit to our husbands is to submit to God. To submit to our husbands is to follow God’s Will. When you do God’s bidding (praying for someone or helping someone in need or starting a ministry or whatever He calls you to do) how do you go about it? Are you grudgingly dragging your feet and mumbling under your breath? I sure hope not! We do it with a willing, happy heart. To submit to our husbands is to submit to God. You should do this with a willing and happy heart. We cannot claim obedience to Christ if we are not following His will with a happy heart.

There is more to submission than being a “servant”. I know that’s what a lot of “modern” women think when they hear the word submission. They think it means being a slave or servant; maybe even being walked on. It is so much more than serving. It is an attitude of your heart.

Eph. 5:33 – Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

How do you treat the people you love? You like to do things for them. You like to show them that they are loved. I guarantee you that when you start submitting and RESPECTING your husband you will see a change in him. He will love you more and you will feel incredibly fulfilled. One of the keys to submission is respect.

We’ve all heard in pop psychology that before we can love anyone, we have to first love ourselves. That’s partially true. But we what we need to love about ourselves is who we are in Christ. When we learn to love ourselves then we can learn to love others with the same love Christ has for us.

Here are three verses I would like you to read and think about for the next day or two:

Romans 12:3, Philippians 2:3-4 and Romans 12:16.

Submission

2005-03-23T14:31:00.000-08:00

Submission? What does the Bible mean by the word, “submission”?

Let me ask another question: do you obey God and follow with His will? You do? Guess what? That’s submission. Submission is a positive thing, ladies. Now, let’s read some Scripture to get a better idea about submission.

Eph. 5:22 – Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.

Are we forced to submit to Christ? Of course not. Then why do we do it? We do it because we love Him and want to live for Him. Do you love your husband?

Eph. 5:23 – For the husband is the head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. 24 – Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.

Well, that pretty much says it all, doesn’t it? We submit to our husbands for a couple of reasons:

Because it is God’s will.
Because we want to obey God’s will.
Because we love our husbands.

We are told to submit to our husbands in the same way the church is to submit to Christ. Either way, it is submitting to a higher authority. It doesn’t mean you lose your own self or your life - but rather you are obeying God and begin to find out who you are in Christ.

Webster’s New Collegiate Dictionary defines submit as: “to yield oneself to the authority or will of another” and “to make available”. I know what you may be thinking; that the word submit seems just so, well, medival and controlling. Then think of it this way: instead of using “submit to my husband” think of it as, “make myself available to my husband.” Either way it is a VOLUNTARY action. It is the ultimate act of love.

Of course not everything your husband may ask you to do is God-pleasing. If that is the case, you must do what you know God would want you to do. You are responsible for your own sin just as your husband is responsible for his.

Priorities

2005-03-20T16:16:00.000-08:00

I have a question for you today (I know that is not a surprise). Who should come first God or your husband? I’ll give you a little hint: God…but what does He tell you to do?

God is number 1A. Your husband is number 1B. Most husbands can be very jealous of someone or something that they feel is moving in on their space. That includes God. Your husband should be *first* in your life. Have a servant’s attitude towards him just like the one Christ modeled for us when He washed the feet of His disciples. Our society will lead you to believe that your children should come first and DH better just learn to take a back seat. However, keeping your husband as number 1 in your household, you teach your kids respect for authority. You are showing them that serving is a POSITIVE trait and you are demonstrating love and caring for a marriage relationship. They will know how to behave when they marry.

Expect your marriage to be a good one!! Whether or not your DH follows Christ has little impact on the mechanics of a good marriage. Of course, the foundation is God (at least for us).

Add some respect and consideration and you will see a successful marriage. Keep love in your heart and your actions and you will see a happy marriage. The only bond an unequally yoked wife will miss out on is a spiritual bond. I am not putting this down at all, okay? For us believers it IS a big deal. But don’t let it make your marriage miserable. You CAN be content in your marriage and have every good benefit of that union while showing your husband Christ’s love.

So, should you turn to your husband for advice in spiritual matters? Not unless he is a Christian. The plain and simple truth: he is an unspiritual man. He does not read the Bible which means he probably does not believe it’s truth. He is not guided by the Holy Spirit. Even if he picks up a Bible once in a while, your husband’s advice would be, well, incomplete at best. It could be misguided or misleading at it’s worst. Talk with your pastor or another Sister or read a reputable BIBLE based book for advice in spiritual matters.

Should you turn to him for advice in unspiritual matters? Yep! Buying a new car, a new house, changing jobs or what sports your kids might or might not play, who should do which chores around your home, where you want to go on vacation ect. Essentially, I am saying to consult him on decisions that are part of everyday life. Especially in BIG decisions, like something financial. Go to God in prayer too! Rely on and include your DH’s advice in these kinds of decision. They affect him to after all. He might not have a great time at a doll museum but you could both have an equally good time elsewhere. Those decisions are part of what makes a marriage.

Living with an unsaved husband

2005-03-17T14:25:00.000-08:00

“Sister Bertha Holy’s husband is so perfect! And so is Sister So and Sos! They are just so lucky!”

Do not EVER compare your husband to other men! Would you like it if he was comparing you to other woman in church? You are setting yourself up for a very, very harmful emotional situation. It’s easy to see the outside appearance; especially if you don’t have to live with them. Remember, NO ONE is perfect: only Christ. All men are just that: MEN. Another good thing to do: spend the day looking at your husband in the same way you looked at him when you first started dating or courting. Remember, that just because you just see him as your ol’ husband doesn’t mean that other women do. Other women will still find him desirable! Why don’t you?
Let me give you some advice: DO NOT make a man (not talking about your husband here) your confidante. (aside from your dh and your pastor of course!) Try to find a couple of good Sisters that you can talk to. There are many reasons for this but I am only going to tell you the obvious one: if you feel like your husband isn’t everything you need, telling this to another man sets up an atmosphere of false intimacy that can lead to lustful thoughts or actions. Also, talking about your husband’s faults only reinforce them in your mind. You certainly don’t want to make him look bad so don’t do it.

“My husband should see that there is more to life than just *this*!”

Now that we’ve all agreed that no one is perfect, it’s safe to say that even God fearing men have problems, faults and struggles too. You need to accept that an unspiritual man is going to have many of the SAME struggles (plus a few more) that stem from having a worldly view. He won’t make decisions the same way a godly man will (through prayer or the Word). As far as your dh is concerned, he doesn’t have an ALL POWERFUL God to turn to. That is just how a worldly person lives. You were like that once and so was I. We’ve been in their shoes. Pray and gently offer advice - avoid phrases like, “You should just give this problem to God,” or “Well the Bible says…” Why? Refer back to the 1 Cor. 1:18.

So you think God can convert him in no time? Don’t even start with me on it. You will just get disappointed. Now before you throw the baby out with the bath water know that God’s time is not our time and His ways are not ours. Take each day as it comes and PRAY PRAY PRAY! Even if he converted tomorrow you won’t see much of a change in his habits or attitudes. Were you a godly wife as soon as you found Christ? Probably not.

So you feel like you are the only one suffering? WRONG! It can feel just as bad to your DH to live with you knowing he often lets you down or displeases you with his “worldly” ways. He might even feel a bit shut out in an important area in your life and at the same time feel like you are smothering him with a lifestyle he doesn’t believe in. Take great care not to present yourself as a “holier than thou” martyr.

So what do you do? Unequally yoked couples are spoken of in the Bible. Read 1 Cor 7:12-13. Go ahead! I’ll wait right here. God is pretty clear. He does not want His people to get divorced but again, if you are being physically abused GET OUT NOW! God’s Word makes NO provision for beating a wife.

The best answer I have is the simplest to carry out but most difficult to do with diligence AND faith.

PRAY PRAY PRAY!

Pray that you would be motivated to read God’s strength giving Word every day!
Pray that you will be obedient to what the Scripture says about divorce.
Pray that God will protect your heart and mind from discouraging thoughts in what might seem like a hopeless marriage.
Pray that God will continue to work on your DH’s heart.

Build up your husband

2005-03-15T14:39:00.000-08:00

Remember the old folk song that was in the Coca Cola commercials? “I’d like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony, I’d like to hold it by the hand and keep it company.” Harmony starts in the home, ladies!!

Proverbs 12:4 – An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones.

Of course, we all know Proverbs 31 so I am not going to type that out. LOL

Eph. 5:22 – Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.

Whoa, that puts a whole new spin on things…submit to dear hubby like we do to the Lord. You cannot submit to your husband unless you are standing right with God. Why not? Because eventually, it will fall apart. God is a firm foundation…flesh is soft.

Proverbs 14:1 (NIV) – The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish one tears hers down.

Build your husbands up. Do not tear them down. Be wise.

Being a godly wife

2005-03-14T12:33:00.000-08:00

1 Peter 3 (NIV) – Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands to that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine cloths. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.

Stop for a second and think about what you believe a godly wife should be like.. Done? Okay. Let me tell you a little about a godly wife. First, no matter what spiritual condition your husband is in he deserves a wife that shows *God-pleasing* behavior. (That shouldn’t be a problem if you are truly following Christ.) Do not hold back ANY good thing from your husband just because he may not share your belief and love of Christ. In fact, the way you treat him just might help him change his mind! I am not saying that a woman can save her husband’s soul…only God can. But we can be a good example of the wonderful, faithful things God has in store. You can influence him without words...but with actions! Show him the love of Christ through what you do.

Sounds good right? Right...but maybe you don’t know quite how to do that. Well, here’s a mini-how to section. Print it out and keep it where ever you will see it often.

Do NOT preach. Remember? Without words…..use your actions! God showed His love for us with the greatest action…sending Jesus to die on the cross for our sins.
Don’t ever use the Bible to back up what ever you open your mouth to criticize your husband about. The wisdom of the Bible is foolishness to unspiritual people. (1 Cor. 1:18).
Praise and encourage him when he does something that is God-pleasing. We praise and encourage our children all the time. We enjoy hearing nice words. We need to share those nice things with our husband too. Even if he doesn’t show it, he appreciates it.
God loves your husband more than you and wants him saved.
PUSH – Pray (for him) Until Something Happens

Some Biblical (and personal) perspective on divorce

2005-03-12T16:48:00.000-08:00

Alright, let me start this off by saying this: if you feel I am being harsh or mean or just plain unreasonable let me tell you in advance, what I teach is straight from the Bible and if you are feeling bad because of something I say, God is convicting you. Immediately stop and go to Him in prayer for understanding and guidance. If you are confused or need to talk with someone privately (or send me hate mail – he he) please send it to: ADD A COMMENT and I will respond as soon as possible. Please pray for me as I conduct these lessons for you. With that said, I’ll start.

I am not your “run of the mill” Christian woman. I don’t save my faith just for Sundays but I don’t preach on a street corner either. I am a stay at home mom but I’ve also been a working mom. I am a married and submitted wife but I’ve also been a divorced single mom, and a “liberated” re-married working mom. During my years as a single mom and a “liberated” re-married working mom, the employment I held was anything but menial. I worked anywhere between 40-80 hours per week because I loved that money and the “comfort” it could provide for myself and my family.

In 2001 I came to know Jesus Christ as my personal Savior and He certainly took the blinders off. I quit working to stay at home with my two children and let me tell you, we endured trial after trial after trial. People say that when it rains it pours…and that certainly is the case. But now that the rain is subsiding I want to explain one thing about that comment: it goes the same way with God’s blessings. When He rains them down upon us, He doesn’t just sprinkle a shower of them – He pours them down and floods our lives. But to receive His flood of blessings we have to learn how to swim in His Word and hold on. Sure, we may be as water logged as Noah when the rain ceases but what happens to the earth when after a good rain? The soil becomes fertile and the flowers begin to bloom.

We know that over 50% of marriages end in divorce – matter of fact, one of the latest statistics I came across listed it as almost two thirds! Seventy five percent of divorcees will remarry. And 70% of those marriages end in divorce.

God hates divorce – He doesn’t hate the people that are divorced but He hates the *act* of divorce.

Malachi 2:16 – For the Lord God of Israel says that He hates divorce, for it covers one’s garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. Therefore take heed to your spirit, that you do not deal treacherously. (NKJV)

Let’s look at this verse for a second. There are two words that really stick out to me. The first one is violence. It says that divorce covers our garment with violence. Violence is a strong word. We all know, in some way, what violence is. We know it when we see it. Do you want the Lord of Lord’s to see you covered in violence? Divorce is not pretty. Read the last word - treacherously.

Dictionary.com defines it as:

Marked by betrayal of fidelity, confidence, or trust; perfidious. See Synonyms at faithless.
Not to be relied on; not dependable or trustworthy.
Marked by unforeseen hazards; dangerous or deceptive: treacherous waters.

To be treacherous means that we cannot be relied upon and are not trustworthy. A treacherous person is not worthy of trust.

When we throw away wedding vows that we made BEFORE God, we are acting treacherously! Having an attitude of indifference toward our vows and marital duties by just deciding that we can’t get along and we might as well just get divorced is dealing treacherously with the Lord! So many people getting married have that attitude – if it doesn’t work, I can always just get a divorce. We need to understand that it’s not that simple for people that love God! Why would anyone following Him want to be a traitor of God’s Word? We made oaths before God. Till death do us part should be just that (provided that there is no physical abuse or infidelity).

Matt. 5:31-32 – “Furthermore it has been said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.”

Let me tell you something. I am in my second marriage. My first husband was not a godly man (but when we were married, I did not follow God myself!). He battered me and cheated on me. It took a couple of years after he left, but I was finally able to get a divorce. I felt guilty for a long time after I came to know the Lord because I wasn’t sure that I did everything I could have to save the marriage. Then God showed me two things: we were “unequally yoked” (maybe not in a biblical sense but I was more family oriented and he was not. I also wish to say that not all marriages that have uncommon interests should end in divorce). When he left, I prayed and prayed that if only God would save my marriage that I would worship Him. But that was not God’s plan for my life. Had I remained with that person, I probably would have ended up strung out, in jail or maybe even dead. And he certainly was not showing me the love of Christ. God removed me from the situation. Now I am happily married and although my husband is not involved in church, he does not hit me or my children, he takes care of us, he loves us. Sure, we may be unequally yoked in a biblical sense but he still shows me the love of Christ. God can use even those who do not worship Him for His own good Will. If you are in a physically abusive relationship, please please please get out now!! That is not what you were made for. You were made as a helpmeet and not a punching bag.

Sexual immorality - a general term that includes premarital sex, extramarital infidelity, homosexuality and even beastiality. Pretty clear isn’t it? We should try to work through the rest of it with guidance from God.

Matt. 19:3-6 – The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason?” And He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning made them male and female and said, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”

These verses are some of the most interesting ones in the Bible, I believe. You see, the Old Testament deals mainly with the laws that the Jewish were supposed to live by in order to maintain salvation. The New Testament while pointing out that the laws are good for us give us salvation through the grace of God. But the book of Genesis tells us the same thing that the book of Matthew tells us: that men will leave their parents and cling to his wife and they will become one flesh. (Genesis 2:24) Yet, Jesus tells us a little more: “…what God has joined together, let not man separate.”

Unlike today, divorce was controversy during the time of Jesus. Jesus avoided the controversy by giving three reasons for why married folk should stay just that. 1. God made one male and one female. If God had intended more than one wife for Adam He would have made more women. The same would be true for husbands for Eve. He who made them is literally, “the One who created” or “the Creator”. The implication is that the Creator is lord and is the One who determines what should be an ideal marriage. 2. God ordained marriage as the strongest bond of all human relationships. A man is to leave his parents and start his own family with his wife. The language is very strong here. Leave means, “to abandon”; joined to means “to be glued to”. The most permanent relationship in society is not between parent and child but between husband and wife. If that can be broken, than anything can. 3. The two become one flesh. The basic element in marriage is a contract - part of that contract is physical intimacy.

When we marry, we enter into a covenant relationship not just with our spouse, but with God. We make vows to God and He joins us together. Should we, as people, try to undo what God has done?

I could keep quoting scripture about divorce but guess what? They all basically say the same thing.

But again, we have an example of the Old Testament and the New Testament touching on the same subject: TWO BECOME ONE. THEY JOIN FLESH. Do you want to cut your arm off? No, not willingly - big problems if we lost an arm. What about a finger? Want to cut your finger off? No! Your husband is your flesh now. Do not cut him off either (no pun intended).

The Battle of the Sexes

2005-03-11T08:37:00.000-08:00

Did you know that the battle of the sexes began in the Garden of Eden?  
It's true!

Let's look at some pointers:

In Genesis 2:21 God made Adam a helper *comparable* to him.  
She was taken from his rib which could be meant as being
equal to man...versus being taken from say, a toe bone...then
seeing man over her.  Or she could have been taken from his skull for
her own superiority.  God deliberately chose the rib.  Because she is
a comparable helper.

In Genesis 2:23, Adam referred to Eve as "bone of my bones"
and "flesh of my flesh".  They were a perfect match...complementary.  
Two ninety degree angles.

Then came the fall of woman kind and then man kind.

In Genesis 3:16 it says, "...your desire shall be for your husband
and he shall rule over you." NKJV

The word desire can mean a couple of things.  In our society, we
use it to let it be known that we want something.  It can also mean
an attempt to usurp or control.  We can paraphrase this part of the
scripture as, "You will have a tendancy to try to control your husband
and he will possess a tendancy to act as a tyrant over you." 

Thus began the battle of the sexes...and to think most people
believe it started during the era of bra burning and "femenist" (sp?_}
women coming out of the wood work to be treated equally.

Both sexes strive for  control and neither necessarily lives in
the best interest of the other in the secular world.  The antedote
to this sickness is the restoration of mutual love and respect and
dignity through Jesus. (Eph. 5:21-33)

Wait upon the Lord!

2005-03-11T08:28:00.000-08:00

Are you broke? Down on your luck? Having trouble at work? Or having trouble finding work? In short, are you having trouble? I have a friend that can help. One that sticks closer than a brother. But you have to know Him. You have to know Him. You have to know that while sometimes He says no, He never leaves us. You have to know that He loves it when we ask for His help. Sometimes His help is just giving us an ever listening ear. Sometimes it’s a miracle and sometimes He simply says, “Wait”. I know it’s hard to hear the words, “no” or “Wait”. But sometimes we have too. We are willing to save our money for a better vacation. We are willing to save our money for a bigger TV. We are willing to work hard for years to get that promotion. But are we willing to wait on the Lord?

If you are in Oklahoma City or the vicinity...

2005-03-10T14:24:00.000-08:00

Come join us for revival starting TONIGHT at 7:30 through Saturday and Sunday service at 2 pm at Courts of Praise! We are a small church that meets at 3629 NW 25th in Oklahoma City inside a United Methodist church. We would LOVE to see you there!

You belong to GOD!

2005-03-04T15:00:00.000-08:00

Mark 12
¹⁷ And Jesus answering said unto them, Render to Caesar the things that are Caesar's, and to God the things that are God's. And they marvelled at him.

You belong to God, sister. Your heart, your actions, your life and your talents all belong to God. Oh sure, the world does get some part of us. Either working outside of the home, going through rush hour traffic, volunteering our time, just plain being physically IN the world.

But that doesn’t mean that we have to act like the world. We belong to God. And I know it’s not always easy to behave the way we should as women of God. Something that always helps me is to just stop and open my Bible and read about the Proverbs 31 woman or 1 Titus or even Ephesians; something that speaks directly to me as a woman of God.

Let the world marvel at you! Let them wonder why your face shines with love! Let them be in awe of your inner beauty. Yes, you have to give to the world but do it in a manner that would please the Lord.

Are you neglecting your talent that God has given to you to glorify Him? That was the real reason why I am writing this. Do you give and give to the world and have nothing left to give to God? Oh what a shame that is. I am guilty of it as well. Sometimes God says to me, “Robin, you need to write my message and here it is.” And sometimes I say, “Wow, that is a good message but I really need to do the dishes.” Everyone does it sometimes but that doesn’t make it excusable or the right thing to do. We need to start giving God what is His. We need to give Him our time, our hearts and our talents to glorify Him. What has God given you to use for His glory? Are you taking the time to do it? I know there never seems like enough time in the day, but sister those dishes can wait an hour.

Greetings in the Name of Jesus everyone!

2005-03-04T14:52:00.000-08:00

Just wanted to let you all know that I have NOT forgotten about this site. Things have been really busy with the move and all. We are now getting settled in. Randall loves his new job with Cox. Bryan loves his new school. Jacob loves having a yard with a fence so he can play with the dogs. I am a little home sick from missing my old job at AAFES but have two new interviews on Monday.

I am also toying with the idea of learning PHP. My church wants a web site and I don't want to use plain old HTML. :)

But I WILL be updating this site very soon! Hey, maybe even now. I think I have a few shorties I can post.

Love and blessings in the name of Jesus Christ,

Sis Robin.

The time is NOW!

2004-12-29T14:23:00.000-08:00

Ecc. 3:1 - To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven

If God is calling you to do something then DO IT. Just jump in and get started. I know it’s hard and can seem scary too but sister, it is God’s season! There is an old saying that there is no time like the present and that is so true! Look at the verse above. It doesn’t say a past for every purpose or even a future for every purpose. It says, “A time for every purpose…”

Thank God that He does not remember our past sins. We sure might but He doesn’t. So if you repent for not doing what God has called you to do and you start right now, He won’t remember that you disobeyed Him. You might remember but He won’t. We humans are a funny lot. We always want to focus on yesterday or tomorrow but never today.

God didn’t promise us that we’d even get to see tomorrow. You might not have the gift or opportunity to get into your ministry tomorrow. That’s why it’s so important to do it NOW. God is the alpha and the omega – the beginning and the end but He is also the present, the now, the right now. So is your ministry. Your ministry is NOW.

Be ye transformed....

2004-12-25T17:23:00.000-08:00

Before I got the baptism of the Holy Ghost in Feb 01, I thought that I could dress any old way I wanted. And why I certainly don’t think I dressed any where near as bad as some of today’s styles (I was a jeans and t-shirt gal), I still didn’t think it mattered. Now I am not going to sit here and type out a bunch of Scriptures dictating to you what you should or shouldn’t wear. I am certainly not one to think that the way you dress will get you to heaven (I won’t get into inciting lust and the like though because that will cause your eternal soul some bad memories when you are forgiven). But the Bible does tell us not to be conformed to this world. God tells us to be TRANSFORMED. He calls us to look, act, talk and be different than the world. I am not saying you ought to look like a school marm. I am not saying that you ought not to look your best. I have long hair, I wear skirts no shorter than my knee, no skimpy tops and I try to always wear a smile along with my spiritual armor. I look different. Now I want to tell you a recent experience I had.

I went to the doctor last week for a rash on my face (turned out to be rosacea). The doctor’s assistant (medical technician) was taking my blood pressure and said, “How much do you weigh?” I told her I wasn’t sure. So she made me get out a scale. Then she asked me, “Are you Apostolic?” I smiled and said, “Yes, ma’am.” She got EXCITED! She wore scrubs and make up and had short hair but the most important thing is she said (after looking around to make sure no else was in ear shot so she wouldn’t get in trouble), “I got the Holy Ghost in April of this year. Things have been so hard between my in laws, husband and me. Would you pray for me?” I jumped at the chance, everyone! I also told her about a verse in Leviticus chapter 25 (I believe) about declaring liberty. If I dressed like everyone else would she have known she could come to me? No! So keep being transformed! Stay encouraged in the Bible and watch for opportunities to minister!

my choice for biography of the year...

2004-12-19T17:33:00.000-08:00

Biography of the Year

Yes, it’s that time of year again. Cable TV is nomination someone for their choice of a biography of the year. Well, I want to tell you about my choice.

My choice loves me more than his own life. He keeps a roof over my head, clothes on my back, food in my belly and someone to talk to anytime. He loves my children beyond measure and there is nothing that he wouldn’t do for them. Anytime I call his name, he drops what he’s doing and is right there with me. Even when I take advantage of him, he still adores me. Now let me tell you his story in my own words.

His mother was set to be married but found out that she was pregnant. Her betrothed was a little miffed and thought about putting off the relationship. But he got some sound advice and didn’t do it. During the late months of her pregnany, they had to take a road trip. But his mother went into labor and there wasn’t any place with a vacancy. But one person had a stable and let them take shelter in there. And that is where he was born.

He and his family spent the first years of his life on the run from people that wanted him dead. One would think that would put a major damper on his zest for life and love of people. But it didn’t. One day, every parent’s worst nightmare took place: their child had wandered off. We can imagine the panic that ensnared them. They found him safe in a church teaching the elders about God. Yes, that boy was something special. The Bible says that we should be like little children when it comes to God. And this guy literally took it to heart!

A little further into his life, this man got baptized by a very unusual pastor that was also his cousin. Talk about a family affair! I’ve seen this man stick up for debtors, prostitutes, adulterers, and those who have done things that might not be as bad and maybe some that could be worse. And this made some holier than thous very angry. And they prosecuted him on what I see as a political technicality.

People were so blinded by the holier than thous that they chose to free a murderer over a man who’s “crime” was what we might consider white collar in our society. By, in their opinion, claiming to be a king of a group of people governed by Caesar. They beat him, spit on him, nailed him to a cross. By that time, I am sure most, if not all of us, would be cussing a blue streak (be honest!). But he didn’t. He forgave them. And he asked God to forgive them. he loved them (and you and me) so much that instead of wanting revenge, he offered forgiveness. To top it off, he rose from the grave to do even more work in heaven and in our lives. That’s why my choice for Biography of the Year (and forever) is my God, Jesus Christ.

Copywrite 2004 Robin L. Christian

A note for the women that are physically abused..

2004-11-28T18:22:00.000-08:00

This website has not (and will not ever) condone physical abuse of a woman! Being submitted does not mean enduring a beating! God's daughters were not made to be punching bags! If you are being abused, get out NOW! You are DEFINATELY unequally yoked!

Now, as far as "verbal abuse" - yes that is abuse and there is a fine line between what a person should or should not take. However this site still maintains the prayerful and godly belief that, in ordinary circumstances, we can win our husbands and improve our relationship by being a godly wife. Over the next few days, I will be posting more about this.

Boot Camp Kick in the Butt Time...

2004-11-11T16:43:00.000-08:00

I am really concerned with what I feel is a lack of respect for our husbands - not just on this list but in real life as well. I know, I know...a lot of you are thinking (or yelling at the monitor), "Well if my husband would just change this or that...if he would just do this or that...what about my feelings?" So? What about them? You cannot pick and choose what parts of the Bible to obey. You want him to change? Then YOU change. Sure, he probably was more attentive to you when you were just dating or courting but you know something? You were more attentive to his needs then too. Men are simple: they want respect from their women, they want us to love them and they want us to feed them. You have feelings - men have feelings too. They just don't express them like we do. I guarantee you (from experience) that if you start going out of your way to please him then he will walk through fire for you. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Submit to your own husbands as you would submit to the Lord. If the Lord lived in your house in the flesh, and He wanted something done a certain way you would do it, wouldn't you? You'd want Him happy, right? Why don't you want your husband to be deliriously happy?!

A happy home starts with us women. I know that some of you are thinking, "Well when I do something nice for him he wonders what I am up to." Who's shame is that? Why is it that he has to wonder that? Keep doing it and eventually he will start doing it back to you. Would it really kill you to just be as nice to him as you are to people you hardly know? Your best friend from church is sick - so of course you immediately make her favorite dish (or two) and take it to her. How often do you make your husband's favorite meal for him? How often do you just tell him that you love him?

Do you really want to know why he doesn't help you around the house? Hang on to your bloomers, ladies... When he DOES do something around the house (dishes, dusting, laundry) how often do you just give him a hug and tell him thanks? How often do you complain about the way he does it or that he didn't do it the way you did it? Men are not stupid - they would rather get yelled at for not doing it at ALL then get yelled at because they didn't do it YOUR way. He is NOT you...maybe his way isn't as effective as your's but if you want it done your way then do it yourself. I do ALL the dishes and I don't complain about it - because I want them done MY way. He helps with the laundry and I don't complain about the way he does it. I thank him for doing it.

When you do a chore of his does he complain that you didn't do it HIS way? Probably not. He's just happy to not have to do it. See, that's the difference between women and men. As women, we find it hard to switch between mommy mode and wife mode. Men don't like to be nagged - a reminder is fine but shut up after that! If it needs to be done THAT badly and you are capable of doing it, then DO IT. But God made the institute of marriage first and you are doing your kids a BIG disservice if you are not respecting and caring for your man.

You like to be complimented and appreciated, don't you? Well so does he! He is a person and has feelings just like you. He might not always show them but he has them. You married him and now is the time to be his wife instead of another mother.

Lord knows I am by NO MEANS perfect - and that's why He presses me to write about it.. Because I've been there and I want to save YOU some of the fights I've been in with my husband. If it wasn't for my Jesus and my mother in law, I'd probably either be divorced (because of the fighting) or absolutely miserable. As you can tell, I don't beat around the bush about much. I am straight forward and that's that. I thought, hey my husband is a man and he is going to have to just deal with it. But Jesus pressed upon me that I don't like to be criticized all the time (especially by my husband) and my husband doesn't like it either. He has feelings too and they matter to me MORE than ANYTHING.

How about you? I hope this boot camp style, straight forward, no non-sense email has served as a wake up call to those of you that need it.

Enduring Rejection and Persecution...

2004-11-03T19:17:00.000-08:00

Matt. 5:11-12 – “Blessed are you when they revile and persecute you, and say all kinds of evil against you falsely for My sake. Rejoice and be exceedingly glad, for great is your reward in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.”

John 15: 18-25 – “If the world hates you, you know that it hated Me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love its own. Yet because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you. Remember the word that I said to you, ‘ A servant is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you. If they kept My word, they will keep yours also. But all these things they will do to you for My name’s sake, because they do not know Him who sent Me. If Ihad not come and spoken to them, they would have no sin, but now they have no excuse for their sin. He who hates Me hates My Father also. If I had not done among them the works which no one else did, they would have no sin; but now they have seen and also hated both Me and My Father. But this happened that the word might be fulfilled which is written in their law, ‘They hated Me without a cause.’

We’re only human. We all want friends and to be loved and accepted. It’s in our nature. We were created to love God…and we were created in His image so it’s natural that we should take on some of His traits (maybe not as many as we would like.) J

It’s hard to be persecuted and to be judged wrongly. It’s hard to feel unloved and unaccepted by the world. Sometimes it makes us think we are alone…and we can’t figure out *why* God let’s us feel that way. The words in John were spoken by Christ right as the Pharisees were planning to kill Him. (11:45-57) The world hated Him, so it shouldn’t be all that surprising that the world isn’t real fond of a true Christian. The world’s hatred of Jesus was a sin against God…Since Christ and the Father are one, those who hate Christ hate the Father.

It is really hard to know what to do when we get those all too human emotions rolling because someone said or did something hurtful to us and made us feel persecuted or like an outcast. On one hand, we might want to curl up and cry or lash out…on the other hand, we are Christians and we know that we should follow Christ and turn our other cheek….and forgive. Let’s move on in this passage to see what else our risen Lord and Saviour has to say about rejection.

26 – “But when the Helper comes, whom I shall send to you from the Father, the Spirit of truth who proceeds from the Father, He will testify of Me.

27 –And you also will bear witness, because you have been with Me from the beginning.”

We all know what happens when you trap a wild animal into a corner. It goes, well, wild! Do you remember the churning feeling from sitting in a pew in church listening to a preacher *before* you knew Christ? It probably ranged any where from mild discomfort to thoughts of, “Yeah, well…he doesn’t know what I’m going through,” or “Sure he says that but we all know he doesn’t really practice what he preaches.” Or, for people like me, I felt all of the above before coming to Jesus. Now, why did we act out in such a fashion? Because of what the preacher said. We had feelings of *conviction*. We felt cornered…our sinful nature led us to lash out. Let me tell you right now, friend, the people that persecute you and belittle you are being *convicted* by God as you spread His message. The Holy Spirit gets on them and gets them in a corner. The automatic instinct is to lash out…just like a cornered animal.

Now, I am sure some would say that since God made us that maybe we’ve all been with God since “the beginning”. I know when I feel persecuted (which is a lot lately – Praise the Lord for starting to convict people and send them on the right path even if it does mean discomfort to me…it’s nothing compared to what Christ did for me), I see verse 27 as being with God since we first started teaching His messages and goodness. Isn’t that a great thought? God is always with us.. We may still feel hurt or persecuted…but Christ had feelings too. Jesus was persecuted too…He went so far as to die for us. And He is with us when we spread His message. He is with us no matter how it is received. The Holy Spirit can comfort and guide us in the most trying times. Keep living righteously in Christ, my friends. It may be uncomfortable here but it won’t be long until we are with Christ on streets of gold and worshipping Him for always. Isn’t that a wonderful thought?

If you need prayer or just a friendly ear, know that I am here for you…stay strong in God and live to glorify Him!

Pondering about the rain...

2004-11-01T19:11:00.000-08:00

I love the rain... I love it so much that no matter how hard or how cold, I never use an umbrella for myself.

I love the way it feels dropping onto my face - the cool sensation and the very fact that it is from heaven. Yet I wonder.... Is God crying because of the sins that I commit as His child or does He send the rain to remind me that only He can wash away my imperfection?

Halloween...

2004-10-29T21:05:00.001-07:00

I am going to be Eliza Lynn Linton for Halloween!

I know, all of you are wondering WHO that is.. She was one of the first female journalists and novelists to CONDEMN feminism! And those of you that know me, know that I hate and detest feminism! It's a nasty movement and is destroying our culture.

You can read about her here:

http://www.uni-potsdam.de/u/anglistik/stud_pro/vic_women/linton.htm